Life here in Helene is a challenge for me in many ways. There are the physical challenges, such as dealing with the heat and humidity, the bug bites, the multitude and variety of noises, and the constant fatigue. Then there are the emotional difficulties that come with living in a community setting with others that I am not related to except by rebirth, and with living among people of a different culture and traditions. You cannot hide; you cannot do or say pretty much anything without it directly affecting the rest of your team here. Then there are the spiritual pressures and changes constantly going on. These are both intensely positive, and at times incredibly difficult to go through. I believe that this is where I have gained most by this season of my life. I cannot say for sure, but I can see this may be the main reason that God brought me here to Helene. I am so very thankful for that – He loves me enough not to leave me in the condition that I am. He always desires to stretch me, to mold me, and to entice me to reach into Him in new and delightful ways! There are times when I am like the caterpillar that is ravenous, eating and eating up life for some future, yet unknown purpose. Sometimes I feel like I am in the cocoon, bound up and going through a metamorphosis that is not pleasant, but is necessary. Then, as you can imagine, there are those wonderful, breathtaking moments when I have fought hard, and am now emerging from the cocoon, newly formed, ready to stretch out my wings to bask in the Son, to gain strength from His love, to fly out into the world for His purposes! Oh, glory and relish those days! For before you know it, the cycle repeats, the pain of change returns, and the purpose of life continues – to learn and grow to be more like our Creator.
Tuesday, April 27, 2010
The beauty of challenges
Friday, April 16, 2010
Trouble in rest
In reading the Old Testament lately, it has become clear to me that whenever the Israelites had "rest" from war, or had time on their hands for whatever reason, they found trouble. They either got bored with the status quo, or were able to be too aware of the distractions of the nations around them, or something, because that is when they soon "turned from the Lord to their own wicked ways". Give them a little time and freedom, they then 'left' God and began following the evil in their hearts. So I had to internalize this, and look into my own life. Have there been times of too much peace and rest when I have fallen away from the Lord? Is that when I have been distracted from Him, and allowed myself to follow the lusts of my own wicked heart? Is this part of the reason that God ordained 6 days of work and just one of rest? I do understand the need for rest, we all get battle wearied at times, and just need to rest in the Lord, my problem is that I won't do that often enough. I will just continue working and striving, all in vain because I am following my own road instead of just looking to Him and staying in the shadow of His wings, listening to His voice to tell me "go there, speak this, touch here, walk there…". This is a different kind of rest, one that is just a freedom from having to figure it all out myself. He tells us over and over again to "wait on the Lord", which means as I wait, I must focus on Him, not on the world around me. Here is the safety in rest without the idleness leading to sin. As you who know me know, I have difficulty 'resting', but understanding the importance of resting in the Lord makes it that much more desirable a thing to do!
Monday, April 12, 2010
Pigs on the beach
I have been on Helene for over 4 ½ years now, and sometimes I forget that things can be weird here when compared with our ways in the states. You probably don't usually see pigs rooting in the sand on the beach when you run in the morning in the states. Not to mention the cows with their ropes wrapped around their horns wandering on the sand, in the bush, through your yard… The noisy multitude of chickens roaming everywhere should be food for the starving dogs limping up and down the path, right? Well, that is what I thought, too, until I learned recently that it is precisely because of their roaming that they can't be eaten…their meat is just too tough to chew upon. How about something that is very strange to us, but is unnoticeable to anyone in the states? Like a small pickup driving by in front of your house? I about fell out of my seat when I saw that happen several weeks ago! That sight came just days after the heart-wrenching sight of a large bulldozer chomping its way up from our dock, through the school fence and over the top of the bushes and small trees that dared to get in its path. We heard the "beep beep beep" sound familiar to anyone who has heard a truck back up, but completely out of context here on the island. Well, now there is a road cut up the side of the hill behind us, where a new cell tower has been built to provide clear cell service to the islanders, who for the most part don't have indoor bathrooms, or a kitchen sink. All in the name of progress, right?